Sunday, 29 September 2013

Hot Stuff - The New Scoobville Scale for Chillies

Dorset Naga - Eleven on the Scoobville Scale

The Scoville Scale (SHU)  is the measurement of the pungency (spicy heat) of chilli peppers.  This is defined as the number of times a chili extract needs to be diluted in water for it to lose its heat.  This ranges from normal bell peppers which rate as 0 SHU  to the Moruga Scorpion and the Butch-T Scorpion which are jostling for the prize of being the hottest in the world at up to 2,000,000 SHU.

The Scoobville Scale (SGU) is different.  This is the measurement of sweating and swearing that emits from the Scooby Gill when tasting spicy culinary delights.  This scale goes from 1 - 11 because it's too normal to do a scale that is from 1-10 (see below for an example of this).

The Scoobville scale is as follows -
1.    I'm kind of getting that.
2.    Yep, I'm getting that now.
3.    Okay, that's got a bit of spingly spangly to it.
4.    That's a bit Mexicano chilliano.
5.    That's got some flavour misbehaviour.
6.    That's feeling Irie firey.
7.    Okay, let's take this outside now as I'm finding it hard to function.
8.    There's absolutely no need for that buster.
9.     It seems I have developed spontaneous Tourette's syndrome.
10.   Call the cops, I'm going to citate your ass.
11.   W.M.D.

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